TD’s Clemson Goodnight for $13.50 (Pitcher) – TD’s deserves the win for concocting the best Clemson Goodnight due to their delicate and balanced mix of sweet carbonation. Though it is more expensive than TTT’s and Itsurweiner’s, it is definitely stronger and better tasting as well.
Itsurweiner’s Clemson Sleeptight for $10.75 (Pitcher) – The Clemson Sleeptight is the most economically friendly of the three drinks, and while comparable in taste to TD’s, the Clemson Sleeptight is simply lacking in alcoholic strength and carbonation. It’ll definitely make you sleep tight, but it won’t ensure a good night.
TTT’s Clemson Goodnight for $11 (Pitcher) – TTT’s Clemson Goodnight fails on many levels, the first being the extremely heavy glass pitcher it is delivered in. TTT’s also fails in their beer to juice ratio since it tasted like apple juice with a little bit of urine in it.
Honorable mentions – The following places did not have a Clemson Goodnight or variation thereof, so we went ahead and ranked their signature drinks.
356 Sushi’s The White Gummy Bear for $11.40 (Pitcher) – One of the football team’s favorite drinks and a popular shot, The White Gummy Bear could obliterate a 10-year-old. This is by far the best drink you can buy downtown, but beware since it is a hangover waiting to happen.
Backstreets’ Blackout for $8.50 (Mini pitcher) – The Blackout is the strongest litcher on the list, and its reputation precedes itself. It is fruity and delicious, and it does not stain your tongue despite its black appearance.
Charleston Sports Pub’s Green Tea Pitcher for $15.50 (Pitcher) – CSP’s Green Tea Pitcher was expensive and boring. if they want to keep up with the other bars downtown, CSP needs to find a way to innovate their drink menu.
(Intentionally not mentioned: the uselessly boujee Study Hall, who charges $12 for one of their “less expensive” mixed drinks. Wake up please; you are in Clemson, South Carolina and your drinks aren’t good enough to be worth that much money.)