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Build a bridge and get over it: Eight fights you don’t need to have

No couple wants to get into a fight over something that can be avoided, because it’s one thing to argue about something important and it’s another entirely to have one of these eight fights:
1. Whether or not one of you told the other something.
Don’t even get me started on this one. Does your partner claim that they asked you to turn off the light before you left? Maybe you reminded them that the new season of “Grey’s Anatomy” is coming out, but they still claim that they are in the dark as to why you won’t talk to them on Shonda Rhimes nights. It doesn’t matter. One of you forgot. Either you forgot you were told or you forgot to tell them. No matter what it is, it’s not worth fighting over. Take it from me: sometimes I will get mad if I tell my partner to do something and he completely blanks. It may have seemed like a big deal that he didn’t come pick me up from class when I asked him to, but in a few hours you won’t even remember why you were mad. It’s not worth the energy to fight over something so petty.
2. Anything that involves friends who haven’t acted reasonably.
Avoid arguments just because you don’t like your partner’s friends, unless you’ve got a real reason to back it up. If you don’t, they’re going to take it personally and no one will be going to sleep happy that night. This is a no win situation, especially when it comes to how much time they should spend with their friends or who they should hangout with. At least try to like their friends, because if you really can’t then you obviously don’t care enough to try and it’s probably about time to get out of that relationship anyway.
3. Being different people with different needs and wants.
Opposites attract. Maybe you’re an introvert who likes to grab take out and sit at home and watch Netflix, while your partner likes to go hangout with friends or get dressed up and go out. I’m definitely the introvert in my relationship, and I would choose sitting at home eating takeout over having to get dressed and go somewhere in a heartbeat. But my partner loves for us to go hangout with his friends or actually go sit down at a restaurant instead of always going through the drive through. That’s where we’re different; sometimes we have arguments about it and they’re silly and completely stupid. Neither one of us ends up getting what we want, and it’s just awkward silence from then on out. So what we do is we compromise. Yep, that’s the magical word. Sometimes we stay in and watch HGTV home makeover shows and sometimes we get dressed and go out to eat or go to his friends’ houses to play video games.
4. Not wanting to go somewhere.
This is not the end of the world. If you’ve got a function that you have to go to and your partner doesn’t want to go, or if you don’t want to tag along with his friends to go drinking then just don’t. It’s fine if you don’t do everything together because it’s nice to have your space. It’s that easy, but it seems a lot harder. The occasional desire to stay in and not attend the event your partner wants to go to is nothing to fight about.
5. Hypothetical situations.
Don’t fight over what you’re going to name your dog five years from now or what you’re going to name your baby. First off, who knows if you’re going to be together in five years let alone five months and second off, you’re not trying to have a baby so you don’t need a name for a figment of your imagination. Get over it. If you don’t like the name Donald, then guess what? You’re not going to have to name your child (that you’re not pregnant with) that with the husband you aren’t married to yet.
6. Hobbies or interests no matter how dumb you find them.
No matter how convincing the argument, you may never understand why people like things like “Star Wars”, football or online shopping. You never will, and best of all, you don’t have to. If it makes your partner happy to sit in the bedroom and play with a light saber then by all means have at it. If it makes your partner happy and they love it, then you should be happy that they are content. It’s just a hobby.
7. Things that happened before you even met each other.
This is a big one, and I feel like no matter how hard you try you’re going to want to fight about this. It’s like the elephant in the room. You can’t get mad at someone for sleeping with or dating someone awful before you even met him or her. You didn’t know each other then and if you think about it, your past is what brought you to the person you love now. This is one I really struggle with. I feel like I’m at Hogwarts and She-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named is always on my mind, but hey guess what? He’s mine now, and I’m not letting him go. Just relax and realize that you’re the one that your partner chose. They didn’t want the person they had because they wanted you.
8. What you want to do, watch or eat.
If you’re one of those couples who always fight over this, play a game with choices to decide which you should pick. A good idea is to make a list of the places you both like to go and number them. Whatever number is chosen is where y’all will go. Or take turns picking what y’all will do, watch or eat. If you’re both indecisive, it’s a good idea to do this because if not you’ll both end up hungry and pissed.
I know at least I’m guilty of almost if not all of these arguments that I can’t even remember having because they were meaningless and downright stupid. I’m not saying for you to hold your tongue and to think that fighting once will ruin your relationship, because it won’t. Fighting sometimes is healthy, but don’t get wrapped up in the trivial things and forget to love each other

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