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Advice Column 9/27

“Over the past year I have been talking to a senior, they graduated over the summer but decided to live and work here around Clemson. I occasionally still hook up with him, but I think I’ve started to get real feelings for him. I don’t see any future with him, but I’d love to have one. He is quite emotionally unavailable and is very uninterested in dating. Any thoughts?” -Anonymous
Thank you so much for reaching out and asking! This situation sounds tough and I’m sure you’re not the only one who’s gone through something like this. I think you have two options based off how you described the situation.
It seems like you could either tell him the truth about how you’re starting to feel or break it off. It sounds like if you continue with the relationship as is, then you’re only going to get hurt. I think that you should try to confront your feelings and see if you would still want a future with him if your relationship was less focused on intimacy. These new feelings could very easily be fueled by many things, including his recent graduation.
I think that the best thing for you to do is to tell him how you feel, and then if things go your way, it’s a win! If they don’t, then at least you won’t be hurting yourself by participating in a relationship where your feelings aren’t reciprocated. I know it can be scary to tell someone how you feel, but in this case, I think it’s the best thing to do.

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