Special Archives - Page 4 of 14

CATbus to carriages

Fran Fran Raisin Bran, Ass. Editor • April 1, 2022

Although the Russo-Ukrainian war is taking place thousands of miles from Clemson University, the campus is feeling the effects of gas price increases along with the rest of the world. After cutting funding...

Itsurwiener opens new basement BDSM club: Itsmywiener

Melbourne Chevy, Senior Writ(it)er • April 1, 2022

Clemson’s newest, hottest club is Itsmywiener! This new club, created by local favorite Itsurwiener, has everything: lights, chains, whips, a bright orange and purple color scheme, Christian guilt,...

Dabo Swinney follows Trevor Lawrence to Jacksonville

Madison Stephenson, Local Nobody • April 1, 2022

After finishing with the worst record in the NFL, the Jacksonville Jaguars have hired Clemson football head coach Dabo Swinney to turn the tide for the team. The Jaguars hope that the connection between...

Clemson Athletics invests in the Metaverse

Dylan White, Minion to the Balls Editor • April 1, 2022

The Clemson University Board of Trustees Finance and Facilities Committee has partnered with Meta to approve a $17.5 million plan to build a state-of-the-art virtual training facility for the University’s...

Clemson admissions plans on banning New Jersey students from gaining acceptance

Victor-Emery, Minion to the Propaganda Editor • April 1, 2022

For With their obnoxious, egotistical personalities and reckless driving (although hardly worse than the South Carolina residents), New Jersey students are overpopulating Clemson and taking away its “southern...

Clemson Athletics extends Brad Brownell’s contract

Anne Leasig, Local Nobody • April 1, 2022

After a groundbreaking season, Clemson men’s basketball head coach Brad Brownell is getting paid. Clemson’s Athletic department announced on Friday that Brownell is signing a five-year contract...

New Badminton Facility to replace the Upper Intramural Field

Fran Fran Raisin Bran, Ass Editor • April 1, 2022

In a recent update sent out to the student body, Clemson Athletics has announced that construction of the new men’s badminton facility, which will replace the upper intramural field on the north...

Deshaun Watson returns to Clemson amid struggle to find new home in the NFL

Grack O’Donel, Senior Bullshitter • April 1, 2022

In a stunning move, Deshaun Watson has announced his return to Death Valley for the 2022 season. After failing to win a Super Bowl with the Houston Texans, Watson has his sights set on a second National...

Coming soon to Clemson+

Sydney Olsen, Local Nobody • April 1, 2022

A 50% pledge to IPTAY is all that’s required to access Clemson’s new streaming service, Clemson+! With the launch, IPTAY, originally “I Pay Ten A Year,” has rebranded as “I...

Sean Kingston to enroll at Clemson

Emily Reichard, Professional Stalker • April 1, 2022

Kingston announced on social media Monday that he will be enrolling as a student at Clemson University in fall 2022. In an Instagram post, Kingston captioned a photograph taken by Katie Bradham, “There...

Towing companies are doing you a favor

David Ferrara, Enema-in-Chief • April 1, 2022

Imagine this: it’s a beautiful, Clemson morning. You wake up at your friend’s place after a long night of bible study. After walking outside to retrieve your car, you find that Death Valley...

PJ Hall transfers to South Carolina

Kevin Cook, Reliable Reporter • April 1, 2022

After solidifying himself as the Tigers’ most consistent player, sophomore center PJ Hall is transferring to rival South Carolina in one of the most shocking moves in Clemson men’s basketball...