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The Tiger

With the drinking age downtown changed to 18, all Clemson students will be able to indulge in sweet treats downtown.

City police lowers drinking age in downtown bars to 18

Popstarpepe, Groupie #8 April 1, 2024

The city of Clemson Police Department has decided to change the legal drinking age in all local downtown Clemson bars to 18 years old. After various complaints from Mr. Wein regarding the loss of profit,...

The first floor has been haunted due to student nightmares of exams and late nights.

Cooper Library shut down after Ghostbusters search haunted first floor

Sparky Parky, Professional Liar April 1, 2024

Due to a recent resurgence in stories of formerly possessed students, Clemson has shut down Cooper Library so the Ghostbusters can investigate paranormal activity on the basement floor. The basement...

The Stanley cups will be Clemson focused.

All Clemson students to receive Stanleys

Juliana Coates, Professional Liar April 1, 2024

As part of Clemson’s recent efforts to promote campuswide sustainability, all students will now be receiving Stanley tumbler cups upon enrolling at the University. “We are committed to delivering...

The new College of Gen Z will have classes on getting zooted and shotgunning.

Clemson to add College of Gen Z

Blakers Mauro, Mommy-in-Chief April 1, 2024

In hopes of graduating the most “straight fire” student population, Clemson announced the opening of the College of Generation Z on March 32. Seminars offered in the new college include GENZ 1010:...

Clemson is ditching orange and purple, hopefully for good.

Clemson to revert back to red and blue colors

Mariah Jordan, Orange Hater April 1, 2024

Aren't you tired of that orange and purple? If your answer is yes, there's no need to fear because Clemson University is bringing back its original school colors of red and blue.  Starting April 1,...

The CATbus is free for all riders and is offered daily.

Fake News Briefs

Josiah Sullivan, Senior Reporter April 1, 2024

Tendy Tuesday to become Gamecock Tuesday Due to a nationwide shortage of regular chicken tenders, Clemson Dining has declared that next year, Tendy Tuesday will be replaced by Gamecock Tuesday. “While...

The facility will include inspirational quotes for journalists by Rustin Jobertson.

The Tiger to move into Clemson football facility

Luke Goatee, Ass Balls Editor April 1, 2024

Clemson University has announced that the Allen N. Reeves Football Complex will be repurposed as a new office space for The Tiger. The facility is 178,000 square feet and gives The Tiger ample space for...

The Watt Family and Innovation Center is about to get quite busy during the night.

Watt Center roof to become an electric disco strip club

Kat Pugh, Professional Liar April 1, 2024

The Board of Trumpets approved funding for converting the roof of the Watt Family Innovation Center into an electric disco strip club to provide students with academic stress relief. Construction of...

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