![Clemson United head coach Mike Noonan is so good at his job that the big leagues are now trying to poach him; pictured at the National Championship in December talking with Cristiano Ronaldo, who flew out just to watch him coach.](https://thetigercu.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/03/cristiano-ronaldo-Photoroom-1.png)
Clemson United coach receives interest from European soccer clubs
Griggin Garfield, Ass Balls Editor
• April 1, 2024
![Clemson head coach Dabo Swinney is ready to use the transfer portal for his program after being against the excessive use throughout his career.](https://thetigercu.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/01/1tnlpwgYL7rxiecNgdT9H7FNO7sQIutBCku8g0x9-1200x857.jpg)
Dabo is ‘all in’ on the transfer portal
Jose Zarrapoopie, Groupie #8
• April 1, 2024
![Thanks to his petite 6-foot-1, 230-pound frame, running back Phil Mafah has been tabbed as a specialist for the future mens gymnastics team.](https://thetigercu.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/03/IMG_5585-1-1200x800.jpg)
Clemson announces inaugural men’s gymnastics team
Kylie Brochard, Sucks Balls
• April 1, 2024
![Littlejohn Coliseum is set to host the gladiator-style brawl between Clemson and the University of Second Choice.](https://thetigercu.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/03/emma.jpg)
Coaches gladiator brawl to settle SC rivalry once and for all
Post Malone, Sucks Balls
• April 1, 2024
![Clemson will reinstate the Wendys at 1 Bryan Circle.](https://thetigercu.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/04/cANylycFz6MSEKNyQAYJdoR70v2f6wRTnxPcwS1R.jpg)
Clemson to bring back on-campus Wendy’s
Kelly Kardashian, Ass. Balls Editor
• April 1, 2024
![Analysts have been watching the stock market carefully in wake of recent recessions caused by Clemson football.](https://thetigercu.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/03/0_nEt-TlslcTGgCMqN-Photoroom.png)
Stock market crashes; Clemson football to pay out
Dixie Normous, Sucks Balls
• April 1, 2024
Taylor Swift to join Travis Kelce on visit to Clemson football
Inez Betty James, Groupie #4
• April 1, 2024
![Shipley knows the sky is the limit for him, leading to his recent decision to flip to the quarterback position.](https://thetigercu.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/03/Stehn-1243-1200x800.jpg)
Will Shipley redeclares for draft as quarterback
Mike Oxlong, Sucks Balls
• April 1, 2024
![Clemson may have its next future quarterback in freshman phenom Levor Trawrence.](https://thetigercu.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/04/trevor-1200x857.jpg)
Freshman quarterback making waves at Clemson spring practice
Luke Mustache, Asst. Sports Editor
• April 1, 2024
![Luckily for Livvy, the transition to Clemson will be easy as she now represents the proper Tigers and the actual Death Valley.](https://thetigercu.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/12/Gymnastics-101_Ashleigh-Snyder46-1200x800.jpg)
Clemson lands Livvy Dunne in transfer portal
Nathaniel Outwoman, Sucks Balls
• April 1, 2024
![The signature orange Gatorade coolers on the sidelines of all Clemson sporting events have recently been redesigned in light of Athletics new contract with downtown hot spot Study Hall.](https://thetigercu.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/03/71sBavwByQL-Photoroom-1.png)
Clemson Athletics to add Study Hall’s Jetfuel to sidelines
E-money, Sucks Balls
• April 1, 2024
![Swinney, pictured at a press conference the day after his chat with the infamous Tyler from Spartanburg, said, I had some idiot go Old Testament on me, and he got an Old Testament response. Yall print that one.](https://thetigercu.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/03/DSC_6474-1200x800.jpg)
Swinney to hire Tyler from Spartanburg as motivational speaker
graciegirl1307, Balls Editor
• April 1, 2024
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![Brian Blomquist prepares for puck drop during Clemsons game against South Carolina in February at Bon Secours Wellness Arena.](https://thetigercu.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/07/IMG_6943-1200x800.jpg)
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![Jack Eggemeyer warms up for a game against Georgia Tech on Oct. 7, 2022.](https://thetigercu.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/07/IMG_1955-1200x800.jpg)
July 25, 2024
![Doug Hallenberk will replace Chris Miller as vice president of student affairs beginning this fall.](https://thetigercu.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/07/douggie-1200x800.jpg)
July 18, 2024